1. I seek to make others comfortable with the way I talk.

2. I clearly differentiate opinions from facts in all my communications.

3. I quickly identify the other person’s communication style and adapt to it.

4. I echo the other person’s body language to create a connection.

5. I look to schedule critical conversations at the most appropriate time.

 6. I start critical conversations with facts, avoiding assumptions.

7. I avoid using opinions or unproven assumptions as facts.

8. I avoid the use of  “Always”, “Never”, or  “I feel like you” during an argument.

9. I avoid saying “I feel like you” during a critical conversation.

10. I strive for clarity by utilizing words like because, for example, or for the contrary.

11. I focus on the problem to solve and not on the person.

12. I see discussions as an opportunity to find a better solution and not as a competition to win. 

13. I consider mine and the other person’s state of mind before starting a critical conversation.

14. I clearly state my needs and wants before starting a critical conversation.

15. I approach critical conversations looking to gain the trust of the other person.

16. I look for the facts supporting my views before starting a critical conversation.

17. I am vigilant to not let my feelings to influence the facts in my communications.

18. I review the facts and what I wish to accomplish before starting a critical conversation.

19. I pause when the other person is overwhelmed with emotions, bringing the conversation back on track.

20. I paraphrase and abbreviate what the other person says to ensure understanding and show attention to him/her.